For the Moms Out There That are Feeling Lost

When you are pregnant, everyone is focused  on you.  There are weekly check ups with the doctor, baby showers and attention everywhere you look.  Then you have the baby, see a doctor maybe once at 8 weeks postpartum, and that's it.  You are magically supposed to have your stuff together, be able to care for yourself, a newborn, your husband and sometimes even head back to work at 8 weeks.  There is a meme floating around out there about how women are supposed to work like we don’t have a family and have a family like we don’t work (don’t even get me started on moming during this pandemic, we can save that for another blog).

Then whether your family grows or not, your whole life is about your family.  Doctors appointments, school, activities etc (the mental load that women carry).  As a mom, our needs go on the back burner.  And then over the years, we forget what we need because we lose ourselves.  Honestly, the person we were before kids is very different then the person we are now.  

An activity that I find is important to do in session with someone who feels lost, is called the Core Values.  It is based on Brene Browns Rising strong framework.  I personally completed the framework and activities and it was empowering and taught me so much about myself.  We look at what are the values that you hold close.  For myself it is authenticity.  When I look back on times when I was really struggling, it was because I was not honest with myself or others around me and I was not able to be my true authentic self.  I am a little rough around the edges, and in some scenarios I have to dial that back in, and that is hard.  In those situations when I have had to pull back on my personality, I am not my best self and it shows.  Things go sideways pretty quickly.  Once we can establish what your core values are, we can do more of the work to help make sure that you are implementing them to be your best self. 

If you are feeling lost, from motherhood or your relationship, please call Harper Therapy at 813-464-3639 and set up a free consultation with myself or any of our therapists.