Self Compassion for Moms.
Being a mom is HARD. I feel like what no one really prepares you for is how much you will be your own worst enemy. When you are pregnant you have an influx of hormones. I remember crying over a perfectly good homemade dinner and had no idea why. Or crying because Pizza Hut forgot my dipping sauce for the cinnamon sticks. Then you get mad at yourself for crying over these things.
Then there is my soap box about postpartum. There is all this attention while you are pregnant, and then, 6 weeks after popping out a baby you are supposed to be back to normal. Studies have shown that we don’t get back to “normal” until 6, 12, or even 18 months postpartum. I know it wasn’t until my son was 2 years old that I finally felt like myself. There is still an influx of hormones and adjusting to this new life caring for a tiny human. But you feel so alone.
Lastly there are the “mom fears”. Yiara and I had a moment yesterday when we were talking about momming and we discussed a common fear of driving over bridges. I know I picture a car accident in my head, like getting rear-ended and flipping into the water and I have to figure out how to save my two kids. No one talks about how normal these thoughts can be and we just beat ourselves up that we are not normal or crazy.
So what can you do about it? This is where self compassion comes in. There are 3 steps to self compassion.
Mindfulness: acknowledge the moment, and take a deep breath in. Place a hand on your chest, or give yourself a hug.
Common Humanity: YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There is someone else who can relate to you.
Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend: If a friend told you they were having a bad day, would you respond with “suck it up”. No, you would comfort them and make them feel at ease. So why do you talk to yourself like that?
These are just a few quick tips for self compassion. For more in depth information on self compassion and momming in this world, give us call at 813-434-3639.