Going – Next steps

You are at a point where you feel like you have given everything you have to this relationship.

You have done couples therapy, you have tried to have the hard conversations, you have gone to friends and family for advice, anything to try and make it work. And yet you still seem to be at odds with your spouse.

You feel stuck.

You’re at a crossroads and you know the time has come to make a decision. You either accept things as they are and make the best of it for your family or you pull the trigger and start the process of separating. Both options feel hard and with each one comes its own grief and pain. But you are ready. You have thought about this long enough and know your truth.

It is time to separate.

This is a scary prospect, probably one of the scariest things you have ever done. Yet you know that not doing it will only prolong the hurt and pain, not just for you but for your spouse and children, even if they can’t see it right now. So you are ready to rip off the band-aid and move forward.

What’s the next step?

Communication is key in this next phase. You may not be ready to pull the plug completely and just want some physical separation. If that is the case, you’ll need to decide with your partner who will be the one moving out of the house and for what amount of time. You will also need to start having conversations with your children about what this separation will look like as well as let extended family know what your plan is.

Finding a counselor that you trust can be helpful in this process, as you and the people you love will likely have a lot of feelings coming up about the change. Having an outside person to help you sort through all of this can be invaluable.

No matter what, there is no easy way of moving forward with this decision but with the right help the transition can be smoother for both you and your family.

Please give us a call at Harper Therapy for help in finding your “new normal”.  813-434-3639