How To Manage Elections And The Keyboard Warriors
Hello friends! At Harper Therapy, we are preparing ourselves for Election time. Whether you are into politics or just an observer, voting is one of our civic duties, and for some people that means going all out! In Florida, early in-person voting starts on October 19, 2020, and mail-in voting and absentee voting has already started throughout the country. Election times can elicit an increase in stress, and an increase in differences of opinion between family, friends and acquaintances.
Today we want to have a conversation on how to address these situations, which mostly take place on social media platforms. Nowadays, we have “keyboard warriors”, who are individuals who hide behind a username, a keyboard and use words as weapons. The keyboard warriors tend to present their point of view as a given and/or will comment on your post with very powerful stances and sometimes words that can be off-putting.
How do we manage the reactivity that arises in us when these events happen? How do we prevent ourselves from becoming keyboard warriors in turn?! Well, we have ten (10) tips on how to manage keyboard warriors during election time and maintain our peace of mind:
We are all different. Let’s agree that different is okay. Difference implies diversity, diversity implies richness of knowledge and more culture. We are different based on our race, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, religion and where and how we grew up. We don’t always what to live in an echo chamber, therefore having cordial conversations regarding these differences is acceptable. The problem stems from when we see differences as a threat. So, if a keyboard warrior attacks the difference, this individual may feel threatened, and we can hold space for their fear. In turn, if you are a keyboard warrior (or feel inspired to share your opinion) be aware of using words that can hurt others, even unintentionally. That does not promote the respect of differences among us.
Agree to disagree. Agreement is not required in a conversation regarding political views. However, we must make the best effort to understand where the other person stands and where they are coming from, in the same manner that we would like them to put themselves in our shoes.
Only type what you would be willing to speak face to face. When we type, others can’t see our body language, hear our intonation and inflections. They can’t tell if something was written jokingly or sarcastically. Most importantly, if we do not curse in person, let us not use the pseudo-anonymity of a keyboard to curse. If we see a keyboard warrior doing this, let’s understand that they have yet to grasp the concept that conversations are best had in person and not through an electronic device.
It’s my right to express myself. Our constitution protects our freedom of expression. In the same line, our freedom ends where the next person’s freedom begins. We can’t bulldoze others just because we want to impose our view. We must understand that we may freely express ourselves, but that there may be consequences to this freedom of expression.
How will my post be viewed by people of consequence in my life. A good filter is to think about what our children will think of us, our loved ones, our bosses if they read the post. There is a precedent of employees being fired due to posts on social media. We know that somebody can tag the post, tag our company and those are grounds for dismissal. Even if it was posted for 2 seconds and we immediately delete it because we thought it through, someone could have made a screenshot, and it lives on the web forever!
You can choose not to engage. It’s okay to read what they are saying, pause, step away and not engage (it takes two to tango!). When we come back, we can decide if we answer from a place of love and compassion or if we do not answer at all.
Explore the feelings that are behind the response to the post. Let’s not immediately assume that people are writing things just to hurt us. Also, let’s think of the feelings that are coursing through our body. Let’ s be introspective, let us sit and understand why we are responding, why we are becoming defensive.
Understand the triggers. There are words and situations that are triggers for us. If we know what they are, we are prepared to read them without reacting in a negative or unhealthy manner. We can better understand that our reactivity may not be directly correlated to the person who wrote, but it’s more related to that emotional nuclear button that we identified.
Shift the response. We can always shift to a stance of peace. We can set a boundary where people don’t “rent space in our minds”. They may be writing on our feed, yet we don’t have to open the door for them to enter and stay.
Unfollow, Unfriend, Decrease Newsfeed Viewing or Block. As a last resort, and if we notice that keyboard warriors are taking up our “soul time”, we can complete these actions during election time. If you feel like reconnecting with them after elections, you may do so freely.
Well friends, this brings today’s chat to an end. Hopefully with these ten tips, we are on a path of managing the impact of election time, and being better able to come out on the other side a bit less scathed. When you look at the tips, most of them also work well for our everyday interactions with loved ones. So, if you are experiencing a high level of stress due to election times, if keyboard warrior are triggering unresolved issues, if you are bickering and arguing with partners, family members or friends and you want to find the way back to peaceful communication, give us a call at 813-434-3639.
At Harper Therapy, we want to be your home for Hope, Growth and Healing!
