You are Not a Robot (Let’s Stop Apologizing for Being Human)

“I used to work 7 days a week, but now I’m so unfocused and unmotivated.”

I sat up in my chair, my spine like a metal rod.  The words came out of my client’s mouth, but I can’t say that I hadn’t thought something similar. 

While I would never say out loud that I worked 7 days a week (I knew you weren’t “supposed” to say that.  Out loud, at least.), I would “sneak” work into 7 days – “catching up” on tasks, doing this “one quick thing”.  And, whether you express the sentiment more explicitly, or you try to slide it under the radar, it’s time that we get honest about how society tries to turn us into a robot – to work all of the time without regard to our own needs and physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and relational limitations.

We’re supposed to work long hours, with not even so much of a lunch break. We check work email from our beds. We don’t take our vacation days. 

Then we wonder why we’re so exhausted and burned-out.

Guess what? You’re not a robot (and neither am I). You were meant to eat, sleep, drink, and go to the bathroom.  You’re a complex human being with all of the complexities of being human.  You’re allowed to get angry, lonely, and tired.  You have the right to have questions, have opinions, need support, need time alone, and need connection.

Let’s stop apologizing for being human.

And let’s recognize how this judgment of ourselves pervades all parts of our lives.  

I love my workouts.  I love the intensity of them.  I love the feel of sweat dropping from the tip of my nose.  

I got done with a workout recently and was proud of my efforts.  Until I looked down and saw the way that the sweat had accumulated at my crotch area.  “How embarrassing!” I thought.  But wait a minute.  I had worked hard for that sweat.  What made the sweat there less acceptable than the sweat that formed on my upper lip or that was dripping down my back?

It made me think back to a hot yoga class I attended once, where there were women in the corner making catty comments about how other people in the class had sweated.  At a HOT YOGA CLASS!!!

Why do we shame ourselves for being human? It keeps us from actually paying attention to our basic human needs.  Truly pause in the moment and think of the times that you didn't allow yourself to be human.  

How you sacrificed sleep to get things done.

How you put off going to the bathroom when you really needed to, making yourself super-uncomfortable.

How you ate lunch at your desk, instead of stepping away from work to truly nourish your body and mind so that you could return refreshed. 

How you shamed yourself for the natural way that your body responds to its environment. 

How different would your life be if you actually acknowledged and honored your limitations, if you made space for and tended to your needs, instead of apologizing for them.

I bet you’d feel a little less exhausted. I bet you’d feel more nourished and cared for.  You might even find yourself happier.  More connected with the people around you.

And, like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, I bet your joints would creak a lot less if you took the time to oil them. 

Call Harper Therapy today at 813-434-3639

Check out Yolanda’s book on burnout at yolandaharper.com