Under Pressure: Self Care For the Caregiver
Hello again! Today, in our “Under Pressure” series we are talking about the importance of Self Care for the Caregiver. During this pandemic, we have taken on many roles. Some of us may have started working from home as the children are at home for school/summer, and our partners are also working from home. In addition to this, if we live in a multi-generational home, we are making sure Mom, Dad, Grandparents are taken care of without risking exposure. This means, extra trips to the pharmacy, additional runs to pick-up groceries, driving to and from appointments, figuring out how to keep children entertained while fitting in some school work so that Summer doesn’t erase our hard work, and being inventive and creating date time with our significant other.
We are reaching critical mass point. Our bodies and our minds are burnt-out, we are fatigued, we are ready for a vacation, we need a break!
If these phrases resonate with you, welcome to the Caregiver realm, where everybody’s needs seem to be more important or come first than ours. This is what we want to address today. How to take care of ourselves as caregivers. Let’s take a look at five (5) tips that could help, during pandemic and non-pandemic times:
Let’s schedule our yearly wellness checkups around our birthday month. This way we will always know when our last dentist, eye check-up, mammogram, colonoscopy and other follow up appointments take place. We need to be physically healthy in order to be emotionally available for those who need us.
Be aware of what our body is saying. Remember that our body keeps score. Let us check in with our body, scanning from head to toe, and noticing where the pressure is building. Do we experience headaches more often, are our shoulders scrunched up, is our chest tight, are we having stomach or back issues? This is our body saying “hey buddy, you have way too much to carry, how about you set down some of those responsibilities for a bit?!”. It is okay to step away from tasks and pace ourselves in order to maintain our body healthy.
Prioritize Therapy Time!! (and other self-care activities). Now more than ever making time for therapy is essential. We need to face our pain, fears, sadness, anxiety and trauma so that these emotions do not pop up in the middle of a Zoom meeting with the head of the company or while our children, partner, roommates or elderly are wanting to spend quality time with us. Even if therapy is different now, via videochat or by phone, the outcome is the same, the effect is always positive because we have already created a connection, an alliance with our therapist, and it really does not matter the delivery method…therapy works because of the human factor. Also, it’s time to make time for our walk, meditation, hikes, beauty salon appointment, gym appointment or crafting session. We only encourage everybody to do so in a safe manner (masks, sanitizer and physical distancing, please!). When our cup is full, it is so much easier to fill our loved ones’ cups.
Use the healthy boundary technique. Set up “office hours” at home. Letting everybody know, from the little ones to the grandparents, that we will be attending family organization/executive decision making during a certain period in the day will be that boundary to keep self-care in the forefront. This way, we do not get interrupted in the middle of “Me Time” or family coordination does not eat away from work time.
Be flexible and fluid. We have mentioned this before…nothing is set in stone. The pandemic has taught us that what was a done deal yesterday, can easily change tomorrow. Therefore, flexibility is key. If we are the pre-planning, super organizing type, we may struggle with this flexibility. We may be short or snarky when under pressure of having to change plans and maybe even improvise. If we notice that this lack of flexibility is impacting our relationships, let us become aware of this, and if needed tell our loved ones; “I apologize for responding in a less than loving way, I see how my difficulties with being more flexible made me snap back at you, when you were just asking a question. I vow to be more aware of this, and will continue improving today and in the upcoming days.”
As we enter the 5th month post COVID-19 we have learned many things, yet self-care is one topic we can continue revisiting over and over again. If any of these examples or these tips resonated with you, feel free to give us a call for a free phone consultation, or to set up your therapy appointment because you have decided that self-care is the key to survival! Our number is 813-434-3639. Let Dr. Yiara Blanco at Harper Therapy be your home for Hope, Growth and Healing!
